I’m the type of girl to walk...
I’m the type of girl to walk into a chair and apologize.
I don’t have a license to kill. I have a learner’s permit.
I’m not with stupid….We broke up.
Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid.
The trouble with life is that there’s no background music.
Don’t regret doing something, regret getting caught.
I didn’t lose my mind. I sold it on eBay!
Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful! hate me because…well…okay…HATE ME BECAUSE I’M BEAUTIFUL!
Imagine your life without me… Miserable huh?
Yes, you have the right to your opinion, and I have the right to think you are stupid.
I hear voices…. And they don’t like you.
- Humpty Dumpty was pushed. I know it all; I just can’t remember it simultaneously. I like the...
- Here are some more! I wish the dollar store sold gas. I don’t want to brag, or...
- I’m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me...
- Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider...
- It’s not cheating unless you get caught.
- Everything is legal. Until you get caught.
- We live in a world where losing your phone is more dramatic than losing your...