Who is this moderation I am supposed to be drinking with?
A drunk mind speaks TRULY…!
One solution to all problems “Alcohol”.
5 Rules of Alcohol 1. Open bar is a dangerous game. Respect it. 2. Vodka can be mixed up with anything. Even more vodka. 3. Tequila changes people. 4. If you do something really stupid, never say that you are drunk. Unless you’re not. 5. If he/she’s still ugly after the 7th beer, give up.
I was sober, but then I woke up
Beer makes you feel the way you should feel without beer.
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking. – Dave Barry
Half drunk is waste of money.
I don’t have a drinking problem. I’m just really thirsty.
Blondes have more fun, but redheads remember it the next day
A night to never forget is one you can hardly remember.
I’m not drunk I’m just holding onto your lawn so I don’t fall of the earth.
Im not as think as you drunk I am
And then alcohol said “Put that on Facebook, it’s hilarious”. But alcohol was wrong, so very wrong.
If I don’t drink and drive, how will I get home?
I don’t have a drinking problem… The glass lifts up just fine thank you.
I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted. – W. C. Fields
Hand me another shot, you’re still ugly.
When Wine Goes in Wisdom Comes Out.
You know you’re wasted when you’re looking in the mirror, and can’t figure out what the heck you’re looking at.
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