Alcohol Quotes | Witty Quotes on the Joy of Drinking - Page 12

So much the worse for those who fear wine, for it is because they have some bad thoughts which they are afraid the liquor will extract from their hearts.
– Alexandre Dumas

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I say when I drink what I think when I’m sober

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The Surgeon General advises that smoking is bad for your health,that’s why I drink.

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You must be drunk cos I can see 3 of you.

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It does not matter if the glass is half empty or half full, clearly there’s room for more alcohol.

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I’m gonna fight you with one hand. But if you spill my beer, I’m using both.

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And then alcohol said “Put that on Facebook, it’s hilarious”. But alcohol was wrong, so very wrong.

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Drink and think but don’t think and drink

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I only drink a little, but when I do, I turn into another person, and that person drinks a lot.

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I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
– W. C. Fields

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Hand me another shot, you’re still ugly.

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Drinking and Driving is the real deal, I drink but never drive…probably because my mom, dad, and 3 brothers where killed by a drunk driver coming from the party I was at…

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It’s a night to remember, if you can’t remember it…

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The only bad thing about drinking and driving is the trees defend themselves really well.

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You look like I could use a drink!

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“Wine is a grand thing,” I said. “It makes you forget all the bad.”
– Ernest Hemingway

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I make wine disappear. What’s your superpower?

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Bob, that quote is both daft and wrong the correct one is:
When life gives you lemons, bring on the tequila! :D

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Love you lots like vodka shots but not as much as tequila.

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Dear Alcohol – You’ve always been there for me, you wipe my memory when I’m sad, you make that girl down the hall look rad, you landed me in jail twice, but were there when I got bailed out ready on ice, you are taking away the worthless years of my life, killing my liver and helping me ignore my wife. Without you life is an endless road, a life better with sober people is such a load, we both know, in the end, we will be together. So pour me a shot, kick it with beer, lets have another amazing night, it’s only us here.

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