Only when you are drunk can your true creative side be seen.
I am not drunk, I’m just chemically off- balanced…
I’m lost. Please take me to the nearest BAR.
She has many rare and charming qualities, but Sobriety is not one of them. – Jane Austen
To alcohol…The cause and solution to all of life’s problems.
Alcohol, because nothing good started with someone having a salad.
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey.
I only drink occasionally but everyday seems like my birthday.
I don’t need rehab…I need refill.
Good thing I drove last night, I was way too drunk to walk home.
My father always said- “the day I can’t do my job drunk will be the day I hand in my badge and gun”.
Beer is better than a woman… It’s always there for you, never disappoints, always makes you feel good and doesn’t care if you drink out of another beer.
Alcohol is the sweet poison having benefits less than harm.
Of course size matters, no one wants a small glass of wine.
Life is too short to stay sober.
If your date ain’t what you expected, drink till she is!!
People say I have an alcohol problem, and I say if there is still alcohol there is no problem.
Drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, drinking fanta makes you fantastic.
Boss. Sorry I can’t come to work today. I woke up this morning and hurt my hand trying to get the cap off my breakfast!
Let’s go drink until we can’t feel feelings anymore! As we say in Ireland: let us drink until the alcohol in our systems destroys our livers and kills us. – all from Family Guy, the drunkest show on TV
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