Quotes by Mark Twain

If I cannot smoke cigars in Heaven, I shall not go.
– Mark Twain

It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.
– Mark Twain

Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.
– Mark Twain, Life on the Mississippi

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I have never let schooling interfere with my education.
– Mark Twain

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
– Mark Twain

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
– Mark Twain

When in doubt, tell the truth.
– Mark Twain

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
– Mark Twain

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
– Mark Twain

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Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
– Mark Twain

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