Quotes by Mark Twain

If I cannot smoke cigars in Heaven, I shall not go.
– Mark Twain

Quote: If I cannot smoke cigars in Heaven,...

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Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.
– Mark Twain, Life on the Mississippi

Quote: Now and then we had a hope...

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It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.
– Mark Twain

Quote: It’s not the size of the dog...

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I have never let schooling interfere with my education.
– Mark Twain

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Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
– Mark Twain

Quote: Kindness is the language which the deaf...

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If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything.
– Mark Twain

Quote: If you tell the truth you don’t...

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When in doubt, tell the truth.
– Mark Twain

Quote: When in doubt, tell the truth. –...

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The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
– Mark Twain

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A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
– Mark Twain

Quote: A man who carries a cat by...

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The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
– Mark Twain

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