Quotes by Phyllis Diller

I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
– Phyllis Diller

Quote: I’m at an age when my back...

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A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
– Phyllis Diller

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
– Phyllis Diller

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
– Phyllis Diller

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
– Phyllis Diller

Quote: I want my children to have all...

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Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.
– Phyllis Diller

Quote: Cleaning your house while your kids are...

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Housework won’t kill you, but then again, why take the chance?
– Phyllis Diller

Quote: Housework won’t kill you, but then again,...

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Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three- dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
– Phyllis Diller

Quote: Women want men, careers, money, children, friends,...

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