Quotes by W.C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
- W.C. Fields
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
- W. C. Fields
I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
- W. C. Fields
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
- W.C. Fields
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
- W.C. Fields
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
- W.C. Fields
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
- W. C. Fields
Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
- W.C. Fields
A woman drove me to drink and I never had the decency to thank her.
- W.C. Fields
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W.C. Fields
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
- W.C. Fields
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
- W.C. Fields
Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.
- W.C. Fields
I never hold a grudge. As soon as I get even with the son- of- a b*tch, I forget it.
- W.C. Fields
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
- W.C. Fields