Clever Quotes and Sayings - Page 4
Patience is not a virtue, it is a waste of time.
Next time I’m on an elevator with four or more strangers, I’m going to turn around and say, “I’m sure you’re wondering why I’ve gathered you all here.
Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
Love all, trust a few.
Why is it that when you pay someone a compliment they proceed to list their faults.
Pain only means you’re still alive
I hate two faced people. It’s hard to decide which face to slap first.
Anger is one letter short of danger.
If you’re not very clever you should be conciliatory.
Whether you’re first or last in the queue depends which way your looking
They say it’s always in the last place that you look
Why the heck would I keep looking after I already found it!
I like to spoon after I fork.
- Jarod Kintz
If practice makes perfect,and no one is perfect,then why practice?
All people have a photographic memory, some just don’t have the film. I do, but it never develops quite right…
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
Why is it that anyone who drives slower than you is an idiot, and anyone who drives faster than you is a maniac?
My parents told me “You watch too much TV and should try reading more!” So I turned on the subtitles.
If you can’t impress anyone with your intelligence confuse them with your bulls***!!!
If you believe that guns are the cause of murders and other crimes then pencils must be responsible for misspelled words.
You do not have to prove something for it to be true. However, you do have to prove something for others to believe it true.
I changed the name on my iPod to “the titanic” so that when I plug it in to my computer, you’ll read “the titanic is syncing”.
Sure hard work pay’s off in the future! But Laziness Pay’s off Right Now !
The glass is neither half full nor half empty. It’s simply twice as big as it needs to be.
A person who asks a question is a fool for 5 minutes..but a person who don’t is a fool forever.
I’ll jump in front of a train for you, as long as the train is not moving.
Do you have a hole in your sock?
If not, how do you get your foot inside it? :)