Clever Quotes and Sayings - Page 6
I’ll jump in front of a train for you, as long as the train is not moving.
I changed the name on my iPod to “the titanic” so that when I plug it in to my computer, you’ll read “the titanic is syncing”.
Money does not buy happiness but, it sure pays off stress.
If there is evil in this world it lurks in the hearts of man.
You can only get smarter by playing a smarter opponent.
The man that says he can’t and the man that says he can are both right!!
Wisdom = refined stupidity
I never do anything by accident. I just like people to think I do.
Those who say money can’t buy happiness are shopping at the wrong places!
If you believe that guns are the cause of murders and other crimes then pencils must be responsible for misspelled words.
If at first you don’t succeed……you’re not Chuck Norris.
All is Legal. Untill U get Caught…
I hate two faced people. It’s hard to decide which face to slap first.
I have 6 locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking locks, they are always locking 3.
– Elayne Boosler.
A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it.
– Israel Zangwill
To someone else, we are someone else.
Half of this planet is dieing of starvation and the other half is on a diet.
To be old and wise, first you must be young and stupid .
Just cause you’re paranoid doesn’t mean that everyone isn’t out to get you!
Patience is not a virtue, it is a waste of time.