Facebook Status Quotes
Women are a strange breed.
They paint their lips;
Show off their inner-wear;
Flaunt their bodies;
Wear butt-hugging jeans;
And then they expect men to notice their emotions!
Not a Facebook fantasy
Quit acting like someone else.
If your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single”.
I’ll change my gender to ‘female’ and my name to ‘Linda’. So when I post an update, people will rush to like them.
If Facebook ruins relationships then guns kill people, pencils misspell words, cars make people drive drunk & spoons make you fat.
There are two types of human beings found on Facebook.
One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts.
And the others are men.
That awkward moment when you change your Facebook status to ‘single’ and your ex likes it.
Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.
In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That’ll teach ’em not to f*** with you.
I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be “Nobody” so when I see stupid stuff people post, I can Like it. And it will say “Nobody likes this”.