Facebook Status Quotes

Don’t do drugs…give them to me.

Submitted by: a$h

You don’t have to like me, I’m not Facebook status.

Submitted by: Dakotah.

I log out from FB. Reason: I am bored.
After 5 min I signed in. Reason: I am bored.

Half- way through eating a horse and realized…I’m not as hungry as I thought…

Submitted by: lisa

Is wondering if wondering is a good thing or do I wonder about something else hummmm, I wonder !!

Submitted by: Chloe

Stop writing love quotes on your facebook.. It will hurt you more than you know.

Submitted by: Idrees

If you see me smiling in public, it means I’m laughing at the jokes I tell myself in my head

I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be “Nobody” so when I see stupid stuff people post, I can Like it. And it will say “Nobody likes this”.

After 11 years in living in the same house I found out that the bathroom mirror opens up into a cabinet.
3 weeks after my dad changed the place of the door in my house. This morning I ran right into the wall that used to be a door that would be the 5th time???

Submitted by: Rose

Dear Facebook, Where’s the “DUH” button?

Submitted by: Lisa

There are two types of human beings found on Facebook.
One who gets enormous amount of likes and comments on their posts.
And the others are men.

Submitted by: Rajesh Joe

Behind every successful Facebook update there’s ctrl+c & ctrl +v.

Submitted by: manek

Say it to my face, not through your status!

Don’t piss me off then tell me to calm down, that’s like stabbing someone and then asking why they’re bleeding.

Submitted by: Jade

If Facebook ruins relationships then guns kill people, pencils misspell words, cars make people drive drunk & spoons make you fat.

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