Facebook Status Quotes
I keep my page public so my haters have something to do.(:
Annoying moment when two people start a conversation on your Facebook status.
Facebook is like a fridge, you check it every 5 minutes even though you know that there is nothing there.
Boys think of girls like books; if the cover doesn’t catch their eyes, they won’t even bother to read what’s inside.
Jonathan is applying geometry to his everyday life: no squares are allowed in my inner circle.
Dear Facebook would it be too much to ask for you to just shut down for one day so I could get some things of importance done? Just kidding, really don’t do that.
STATUS UPDATE MONDAY: While at work today I received an anonymous tip that “FED EX” will be going out of business soon.
STATUS UPDATE TUESDAY: While at work today I received an anonymous tip that “UPS” will be going out of business soon.
STATUS UPDATE WEDNESDAY: I just received another anonymous tip that both companies have merged. “FED UP”
I’m cle’a[ni.ng m’y’ ke]yb36oa;rd.
My job is definitely secure. No one else wants it.
I failed my online quiz, did great on my FB status.
Linda notices that nobody ever says, “It’s only a game” when their team is winning.
If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up remember…You can always change your birthday on Facebook!
Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.
(Writes on FB) Gotta update my status (Clicks update)
Quit posting junk that no one cares about!! It’s called FILLING UP MY NEWS FEED!!!