Facebook Status Quotes

Neal is nealing the neally neal with the help of his close neal.

Facebook should have a limit on times you can change your relationship status… After 3 it should default to “unstable”.

Submitted by: Hussein

Jolene understands that hard work has a future payoff but Laziness pays off now.

Sean is going to drink wet cement and get really stoned.

I said “no” to drugs, but they just wouldn’t listen.


I used to be schizophrenic, but we’re all right now.

I thought I wanted a long career, turns out I just wanted cash money.

In the past, when you were angry with someone you fought them. Now you just delete them off Facebook. That’ll teach ’em not to f*** with you.

“My memory is so bad” “How bad is it” “How bad is what?”

Submitted by: Brighton Zephania

Face your problems; don’t Facebook them.

Submitted by: Millie

James is going to borrow money from a pessimist. They don’t expect to be paid back.


James is for external use only. See your doctor before administering.

Sara couldn’t myself have better it said.

You actually have friends? Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD.

Josh thinks that if your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” that you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single”

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