Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings

If you want to look young and thin on your birthday. Hang around a bunch of old fat people.

Submitted by: Anthony

So far, this is the oldest I’ve ever been.

Submitted by: Claire

It has been scientifically proven that too many birthdays will kill you.

Submitted by: someone

Every once in a while, special people are put on this earth. People with deep passion, immense love for others. People with hearts much greater than average, and today, one of them would like to wish you a happy birthday.
Happy Birthday.

Submitted by: marcel

Something to remember on your birthday..Forget the past, it can’t be changed..And, forget the present because I didn’t get you one.

Submitted by: Brian Jones

It is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me! I want people to know WHY I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Submitted by: Roger

Birthdays are good for your health. Studies show those who have more Birthdays live longer.

When asked how old I am I reply, “Old enough to know better, and young enough to do it again!”

Submitted by: June

Forget the past, you can’t change.
Forget the future, you can’t predict it.
Forget the present, I didn’t get you one!

Happy Birthday!

That awkward moment when it’s your birthday and everyone is singing “Happy birthday to you” and you just stand there clueless of what to say.

Submitted by: Anika

At least you’re not as old as you will be next year! Happy birthday!!!

Submitted by: Mike C.

Birthdays are like boogers the more you have the harder it is to breath.

Submitted by: b :)

When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half… Forget that, after I finally learned to talk, my parents were telling me to shut up.

Submitted by: An Alien

When you are over the hill you pick up speed!

Submitted by: Bruce K

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