Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 2
Birthdays are like boogers the more you have the harder it is to breath.
When asked how old I am I reply, “Old enough to know better, and young enough to do it again!”
When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half… Forget that, after I finally learned to talk, my parents were telling me to shut up.
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
- Samuel Johnson
If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
- Eubie Blake
Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty- five for years.
- Oscar Wilde
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
- Erma Bombeck
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.
- John Glenn
Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
- Maurice Chevalier
You’re so old when you look at your birth certificate it said expired.
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
- Gracie Allen
Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty.
- James Thurber
Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
- Robert Frost
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
- Robert Frost
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
Age is a number and mine is unlisted.
About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
- Gloria Pitzer