Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 2


So far, this is the oldest I’ve ever been.

Submitted by: Claire

Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
– Maurice Chevalier


Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
Robert Frost


I can’t believe you’re almost 18. You’ll be able to go to jail!

Submitted by: jenne petell

A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
– R. C. Ferguson


How do you expect me to remember your birthday, when you never look any older? Happy birthday!
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Submitted by: Silly-Me!

Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty.
– James Thurber


When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half… Forget that, after I finally learned to talk, my parents were telling me to shut up.

Submitted by: An Alien

You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.


Of course you’re not old! You aren’t very young either.

Submitted by: Awesomeee!!

Inside every older person is a younger person – wondering what the hell happened.
– Jennifer Yane


A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
Robert Frost


You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Bob Hope
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When asked how old I am I reply, “Old enough to know better, and young enough to do it again!”

Submitted by: June

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
– Ogden Nash


When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.


Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
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Birthdays are like boogers the more you have the harder it is to breath.

Submitted by: b :)

If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
– Euripedes


I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
– Phyllis Diller


Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
– Pope John XXIII


Birthdays are like boogers, the more you have the harder it is to breathe!

Submitted by: Melissa

Act your age not your shoe size.

Submitted by: Babee 'x

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain


Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
– Mary Schmich

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