Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
– Bob Hope
Halloween = Candy
Thanksgiving = Food
Christmas = Gifts
New Year = Drinks
Valentines = Sex
Birthday = All Of The Above
Do you know why old men wear black socks with sandals? You’re one year closer to finding out. Happy Birthday.
Hey I’m not saying you’re old… I’m just saying that if you were milk I’d smell you before I poured you on my cereal.
Age is a number and mine is unlisted.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
– Gracie Allen
Happiness is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth. And that’s what you feel today. Happy Birthday.
A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
– R. C. Ferguson
Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty- five for years.
– Oscar Wilde
Happy Birthday, have fun and just remember you’re only as young as you look so therefore you better have as much fun as you can and quick!
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.
– John Glenn
You may not be over the hill yet, but you have a great view!.
Inside every older person is a younger person – wondering what the hell happened.
– Jennifer Yane
Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
– Robert Frost
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
– Robert Frost
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
– Samuel Johnson
Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
– Maurice Chevalier