Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
– Pope John XXIII
About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
– Gloria Pitzer
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
– Bette Midler
The best way of staying young is lying about your age.
Every once in a while, special people are put on this earth. People with deep passion, immense love for others. People with hearts much greater than average, and today, one of them would like to wish you a happy birthday.
Smile, it could be worse…think about what you’ll look like in ten years. Happy Birthday.
Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
I’m just here for the cake.
Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
– Robert Southey
Birthdays are good for your health. Studies show those who have more Birthdays live longer.
One more year of existence down the drain. Happy Birthday!
You’re so old when you look at your birth certificate it said expired.
Happy Birthday. I promise I won’t tell how old you really are!
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
– Billie Burke
Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty.
– Joan Rivers
At least you’re not as old as you will be next year! Happy birthday!!!
My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of… Lord- only- knows.
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
It’s better to be over the hill than 6 feet under it!
Halloween = Candy
Thanksgiving = Food
Christmas = Gifts
New Year = Drinks
Valentines = Sex
Birthday = All Of The Above
To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.
You would have loved the gift I didn’t bother getting you.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
– Mark Twain
With age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest people I know.
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.