Funny Happy Birthday Quotes & Sayings | Birthday Humor - Page 4

When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
– Gracie Allen

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I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
– Phyllis Diller

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One more year of existence down the drain. Happy Birthday!

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Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.

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Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
– Mary Schmich

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Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
– Pope John XXIII

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Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
– Mark Twain

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If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.

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The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
– Samuel Johnson

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About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
– Gloria Pitzer

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If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
– Euripedes

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Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
– Maurice Chevalier

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Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty.
– James Thurber

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Look at the bright side, 10 years ago today you turned 40.

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With age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest person I know.

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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
– Father Larry Lorenzoni

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To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.

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Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
– Robert Southey

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A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
– Erma Bombeck

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Kids wish to be older, adults wish to be younger.

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