Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings

Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go- unless you enjoy them.

Submitted by: Thomas B.

I was gonna make you a rum cake but now it’s just a cake and I’m drunk.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Bob Hope

Hey I’m not saying you’re old… I’m just saying that if you were milk I’d smell you before I poured you on my cereal.

Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty- five for years.
Oscar Wilde

Funny Birthday Quotes Quote: Thirty five is a very attractive age;...

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Age is a number and mine is unlisted.

A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
– R. C. Ferguson

Halloween = Candy
Thanksgiving = Food
Christmas = Gifts
New Year = Drinks
Valentines = Sex
Birthday = All Of The Above

Funny Birthday Quotes Quote: Halloween = Candy Thanksgiving = Food Christmas...

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Do you know why old men wear black socks with sandals? You’re one year closer to finding out. Happy Birthday.

Submitted by: Susan

Happiness is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth. And that’s what you feel today. Happy Birthday.

Submitted by: Dasha

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