Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings

I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
Phyllis Diller

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain

Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
– Mary Schmich

You may not be over the hill yet, but you have a great view!.

Submitted by: (:recyclinator:)

If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
– Eubie Blake


The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
Samuel Johnson

Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
– Pope John XXIII

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
Mark Twain

About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
– Gloria Pitzer

Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
– Maurice Chevalier

Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty.
– James Thurber


A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
Erma Bombeck

Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.

Kids wish to be older, adults wish to be younger.

Submitted by: EmEm

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
– Ogden Nash

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