Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings

Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
– Maurice Chevalier

You may not be over the hill yet, but you have a great view!.

Submitted by: (:recyclinator:)

If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
– Eubie Blake

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
Mark Twain

The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
Samuel Johnson

Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
– Mary Schmich

Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
– Pope John XXIII

I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
Phyllis Diller

Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.

About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
– Gloria Pitzer

Kids wish to be older, adults wish to be younger.

Submitted by: EmEm

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
Erma Bombeck

Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty.
– James Thurber

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
– Ogden Nash

If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
– Euripedes

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