A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. – Erma Bombeck
Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty. – Joan Rivers
The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet. – Robert Orben
Birthdays are God’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese. – Billie Burke
My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of… Lord- only- knows.
You would have loved the gift I didn’t bother getting you.
Happy Birthday. I promise I won’t tell how old you really are!
What goes up but never comes down? Your age.
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
It’s better to be over the hill than to buried under it.
Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own. – Bette Midler
Birthdays – Too young to forget them and too old to care.
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
Say goodbye to the flirty 30’s and bring on the naughty 40’s.
Every year on your birthday, be nice to your kids. The older you get the closer it comes for them to choose a nursing home.
You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
You’re how old? Just be glad your age is not calculated in “Dog years”. They would have put you down by now!
Old age is when you reverse your car from your driveway into your neighbor’s swimming pool across the road and believe it was the car’s fault and not yours.
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