Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings - Page 6
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.
- John Glenn
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
- Samuel Johnson
Happy Birthday. I promise I won’t tell how old you really are!
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
- Billie Burke
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.
- Ogden Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of… Lord- only- knows.
Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty.
- Joan Rivers
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
- Bette Midler
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
- Mark Twain
One more year of existence down the drain. Happy Birthday!
A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
- R. C. Ferguson
If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
- Maurice Chevalier
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
Age is a number and mine is unlisted.
With age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest people I know.
Thirty five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty- five for years.
- Oscar Wilde
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
- Father Larry Lorenzoni
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller
If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
- Eubie Blake
Smile, it could be worse…think about what you’ll look like in ten years. Happy Birthday.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
- Mark Twain