Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings

87

A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”.

Funny Golf Quotes Quote: A “Lion” would never cheat on his...

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Submitted by: Lakiyah King
14

My golf score seems to improve considerably when I have the score card.

Submitted by: Terry
2

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
– Hank Aaron

8

Swing hard, in case you hit it!

Submitted by: Mowldsey
12

My worst day at golf still beats my best day at work.

Submitted by: corn rows
1

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex- wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
– Lee Trevino

2

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf – it’s almost a law.
– H. G. Wells

2

You’ve just got one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you’ve hit it.
– Sam Snead

2

I know I’m getting better at golf because I’m hitting fewer spectators.
– Gerald Ford

2

I don’t want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.
– Rogers Hornsby

1

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
– Phyllis Diller

1

Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
– Harry Vardon

1

I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart.
– Buddy Hackett

3

I’m the best. I just haven’t played yet.
Muhammad Ali (When asked about his Golf game)

1

For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
– Dave Barry

1

Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf… And you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf.
– Jack Benny

1

If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
– Jack Lemmon

4

Golf has produced a lot of millionaires…most of them are former billionaires.

Submitted by: 19th hole
3

I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
– Lee Trevino

1

Whoever said “Practice makes perfect” obviously never played golf.

Submitted by: Lipschitz
3

If I had cleared the trees and drove the green, it would’ve been a great shot.
– Sam Snead

3

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
– P.J. O’Rourke

3

If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
Bob Hope

3

I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.
– Ben Hogan

3

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
– Billy Graham


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