Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings - Page 2
Whoever said “Practice makes perfect” obviously never played golf.
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
- Billy Graham
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill- designed for the purpose.
- Winston Churchill
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards ?
- Al Boliska
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie.
- George Deukmejian
Golf is a game in which you yell “fore,” shoot six, and write down five.
- Paul Harvey
I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.
- G. K. Chesterton
Early to bed, early to rise, golf all day & make up lies.
I found Jesus on the golf course. Well at least I heard his name several times.
Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at.
- Jimmy Demaret
Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can’t play it.
- Ted Ray
To golf or not to golf?? What a stupid question!
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
- Jim Bishop
I never found golf interesting, but then I learned thats just where men go to let go of there anger.
If you’ve forgotten what frustration is like, spend 10 minutes on a golf course.
I hold several records on the golf course, but they all pertain to beer.
My most consistent and reliable shot is always the double at the 19th.
Golf is an unusual game. When you have a good day, you can’t wait to get back out there, and when you have a bad day, you can’t wait to get back out there.
Golf is horrifying, humiliating, and humbling, but I can’t wait to do it again.
I’d rather have my worst day on the golf course, than my best day at work.
Golf is flog backwards. And golfing is just one drawn- out self- flogging which costs you money.
Golf was invented by wives to get their husbands out of the house on cleaning day.
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
- Tiger Woods
You always know a bad golfer’s name. He’s always cursing at himself.
The size of the divot is directly proportional to the frustration felt.