Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings | Golfing Humor - Page 4

Golf is flog backwards. And golfing is just one drawn- out self- flogging which costs you money.

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Golf was invented by wives to get their husbands out of the house on cleaning day.

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They named it GOLF because all the other Four- Letter words were taken.

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That ball came off the club face like a cotton ball.

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The difference between a great golfer and an average golfer is not that a great golfer is incapable of hitting a poor shot, it is what he does after that shot.

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Golf is a puzzle without an answer. I’ve played the game for 40 years and I still haven’t the slightest idea of how to play.
– Gary Player

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It says something about the stupidity of a game where the lowest negative score wins.

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Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the player always lies well.

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A golfer’s diet: live on greens as much as possible.

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That ball rolled like a dead rat in a corn field.

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A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponent’s luck.

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We learn so many things from golf – how to suffer, for instance.
– Bruce Lansky

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Gone golfin’ … be back dark thirty.

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Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it’s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
– Dave Barry

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That was the right club with the wrong guy swinging it.

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If it goes right it’s a slice. If it goes left it’s a hook. If it goes straight it’s a miracle.

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The only sure rule in golf is he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.
– Mickey Mantle

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Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.

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I really, really do not like golf, I simply just love it.

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I started watching golf for the first time yesterday. I’m really worried about myself. I was actually enjoying it.
– Ewan McGregor

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