Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings

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Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Marriage is a relationship in which one...

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Submitted by: Prady

You know… There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!!!
Bill Maher

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: You know… There is a name for...

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Marriage is when a man looses his bachelors degree and woman gets her masters degree.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Marriage is when a man looses his...

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Submitted by: ramakochhar

Husband is the HEAD of the family and wife is the NECK that turns the head around!!

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Husband is the HEAD of the family...

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Submitted by: payal

My hubby may wear the pants in our family but I control the zipper!

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: My hubby may wear the pants in...

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Submitted by: harleyrose_80

A marriage license is a license which allows a woman to drive a man!
WHEN YOU SAY “I DO” , “YOUR DONE”!
A wife’s view point! “What’s “hers is hers”! And “What’s yours is hers also”!
Remember! If she ain’t happy, you ain’t happy either!
When I said, “I DO”! She said, “OH NO YOU DON’T”!
If my wife ran the world ,there wouldn’t be any wars… But there wouldn’t be any peace either!

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: A marriage license is a license which...

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Submitted by: Earl Jones

When I married Ms Right, I didn’t know her first name was “Always” !

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: When I married Ms Right, I didn’t...

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Submitted by: John

Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
The mafia wants either your money or life… Wives want both!

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Why are wives more dangerous than the...

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Submitted by: Amrik Singh

Marriage is just fancy word to adopt an over grown male child who is no more handled by his parents.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Marriage is just fancy word to adopt...

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Submitted by: SOSY

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Every man wants a wife who is...

Submitted by: Jack

Some remain single and make wonders happen.
Some have boyfriends and see wonders happen.
The rest get married and wonder what happened.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Some remain single and make wonders happen....

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Submitted by: Alex

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I am wrong and she agrees with me. :)

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: My wife and I always compromise. I...

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The only time my wife is listening to me is when I’m saying do you want some money.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: The only time my wife is listening...

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Submitted by: Freddy

The only moment that my wife listens to me is when I’m talking in my sleep.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: The only moment that my wife listens...

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Submitted by: stephen

In our marriage everything is 50/50. I cook, he eats. I wash, we wears. I shop, he pays!

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

Marriage is like a deck of cards. All you need in the beginning is two hearts and a diamond. After 10 years you need a club and spade.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Marriage is like a deck of cards....

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Submitted by: Carrie

Behind every successful wife, stands a surprised mother in law.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Behind every successful wife, stands a surprised...

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Submitted by: nancy saliba

Marriage is when a man and woman become one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Marriage is when a man and woman...

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Submitted by: Jack

Funniest contradicting phrases:
1.Clearly misunderstood
2.Exact estimate
3.Small crowd
4.Act naturally
5.Found missing
6.Fully empty
7.Happily married

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Funniest contradicting phrases: 1.Clearly misunderstood 2.Exact estimate...

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Submitted by: Alex

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