Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 3


A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.

Submitted by: Aswin

Once upon, there was this man who asked a woman “Will you marry me?”
The woman said “NO!”
Then the man lived happily ever after, rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and did whenever he wanted.
“THE END” (…true story)

Submitted by: DroidTsuenik9

Another word for a court judge saying “you are sentenced to life imprisonment with hard labor” is marriage.

Submitted by: dsgidden

Women marry for prosperity, development and security whereas men marry for enjoyment, destruction and insecurity.

Submitted by: raina

100% of divorces start in marriage.

Submitted by: Cecil Turtle

Man is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.

Submitted by: Sarah

Married life is so easy. It’s just like a walk in the park.
BUT the problem is:

that the park is Jurassic!

Submitted by: AAMIR

Every time I find Mr. Right my husband scares him off.

Submitted by: naomi

9 out of 10 men are cheating on their wife, and there is one more who is still hesitating.

Submitted by: NeverBeen Loved

An idea can change your life. A wife can change your idea.

Submitted by: vamsi

Falling in love is a beautiful experience; Marriage is hitting the rock bottom reality.

Submitted by: jasmineaqua

I thought I was stupid until I got married, my stupidity was confirmed.

Submitted by: Toks

They say marriage is life, they also say life ain’t fair.

Submitted by: Lateef92

Wife: Worries Invited For Ever

Submitted by: kibanya

Man: I wear the pants in the relationship.
Woman: I’m the belt that holds the pants up!

Submitted by: Hillary and Frank

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Submitted by: kapil

Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.

Submitted by: jocelyn

If marriages are made in heaven…
Then it’s obvious that someone up there doesn’t like us.

Submitted by: malcolm john

Your child is as you raise him. And your husband as you train him.

Submitted by: rasha

Height of misunderstanding – A man marrying his own secretary thinking that she will still follow his orders as before.

Submitted by: prashant

The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.

Submitted by: Leo

There are two sides in a marriage, one who is always right and the other is called…..the husband.

Submitted by: shirley

Marriage is, above all else, the leading cause of divorce.

Submitted by: Chris

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

Submitted by: Randall

Marriage is one of the leading causes of divorce.

Submitted by: Dennis Mapfumo

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