Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
Love is blind, marriage is the eye- opener.
Marriage – a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters written in prose.
– Beverly Nichols
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
– Henry Youngman
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
– Groucho Marx
Never get married in college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.
– Elbert Hubbard
Marriage is when a man looses his bachelors degree and woman gets her masters degree.
For happy married life men must remember: when you are wrong confess immediately, when right keep mum.
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
– Henny Youngman
Love is one long sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock!
I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.
Married life is so easy. It’s just like a walk in the park.
BUT the problem is:
that the park is Jurassic!
It seems like I was only married yesterday……..If it was tomorrow I would cancel it.
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
Remember- you can either be happy or RIGHT.
There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.
– James Holt McGavran
Marriage is just fancy word to adopt an over grown male child who is no more handled by his parents.
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
– Groucho Marx
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.
– Rita Rudner
African proverb: He who marries a beautiful wife and he who plants corn by the roadside all have the same problem; insecurity.
The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.
You have got to get married you just can’t go through life enjoying yourself.
Marriage is far more complicated than quantum physics.
I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.
My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.