Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings

Remember- you can either be happy or RIGHT.

Submitted by: casey

I thought I was stupid until I got married, my stupidity was confirmed.

Submitted by: Toks

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.
– James Holt McGavran

You have two options in a marriage. You can either be happy or you can be right.

Submitted by: Brandon B

Never get married in college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.
Elbert Hubbard

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When ever you can afford to get married. Buy yourself a sports car.

Submitted by: Jet set

Before marriage, each looks at the other through rose- colored glasses. After marriage, they see each other with magnifying glasses!

Submitted by: Bob Bedford

Height of misunderstanding – A man marrying his own secretary thinking that she will still follow his orders as before.

Submitted by: prashant

Marriage is like a poker game. You start out with a pair. She shows a heart. He flashes a diamond. She gets a flush. And he ends up with a full house and a big pot!!

Submitted by: Ken Murray

My husband wears the pants in my house… The ones I pick.

Submitted by: Danielle

I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.

Submitted by: shalala
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My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx

Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
Chris Rock

The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
– E. Joseph Cossman

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