Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 4

5

My husband wears the pants in my house… The ones I pick.

Submitted by: Danielle
15

Man + married + divorced + married again = stupid to the 3rd power

Submitted by: Zuheily
3

The definition of True Love: Temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Submitted by: ANGELA
31

Congrats, you’re married but for how long again???

Submitted by: sammyguechiee
9

Marriage is an institution in which those who are out want to get in and those who are in want to get out.

Submitted by: Freddy Henry
7

Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.

Submitted by: Ed
6

Think your wife doesn’t listen to a word you say? Try talking in your sleep!

Submitted by: Frank Nigel
13

Marriage is like a deck of cards. All you need in the beginning is two hearts and a diamond. After 10 years you need a club and spade.

Submitted by: Carrie
12

Marriage means commitment, so does insanity…

Submitted by: leirbag
8

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr
9

I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.

Submitted by: shalala
17

I found another word for slave… Groom

Submitted by: lucas
9

I married Miss Right. Didn’t know her first name was Always.

Submitted by: tushar
10

Two men were talking and one said for their 10th anniversary he took his wife to Hawaii. Said for their 20th he might go back and get her.

Submitted by: kygman
13

Some remain single and make wonders happen.
Some have boyfriends and see wonders happen.
The rest get married and wonder what happened.

Submitted by: Alex
6

Funniest contradicting phrases:
1.Clearly misunderstood
2.Exact estimate
3.Small crowd
4.Act naturally
5.Found missing
6.Fully empty
7.Happily married

Submitted by: Alex
11

My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.

Submitted by: Siddharth Manchanda
4

Marriage is far more complicated than quantum physics.

Submitted by: William Mocca
93

The secret to a good marriage is… Divorce!!

Submitted by: Richo Chango
9

Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
The mafia wants either your money or life… Wives want both!

Submitted by: Amrik Singh
5

Before marriage, each looks at the other through rose- colored glasses. After marriage, they see each other with magnifying glasses!

Submitted by: Bob Bedford
7

Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!

Submitted by: Ralph ABK6
14

It seems like I was only married yesterday……..If it was tomorrow I would cancel it.

Submitted by: Darkside
13

Marriage is a union of give and take. He gives, She takes.

Submitted by: CRILLBO
48

Marriage. Man’s worst nightmare.

Submitted by: Malik

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