Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 4

6

Think your wife doesn’t listen to a word you say? Try talking in your sleep!

Submitted by: Frank Nigel
12

Marriage is like a deck of cards. All you need in the beginning is two hearts and a diamond. After 10 years you need a club and spade.

Submitted by: Carrie
12

Marriage means commitment, so does insanity…

Submitted by: leirbag
7

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr
8

I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.

Submitted by: shalala
16

I found another word for slave… Groom

Submitted by: lucas
8

I married Miss Right. Didn’t know her first name was Always.

Submitted by: tushar
9

Two men were talking and one said for their 10th anniversary he took his wife to Hawaii. Said for their 20th he might go back and get her.

Submitted by: kygman
12

Some remain single and make wonders happen.
Some have boyfriends and see wonders happen.
The rest get married and wonder what happened.

Submitted by: Alex
6

Funniest contradicting phrases:
1.Clearly misunderstood
2.Exact estimate
3.Small crowd
4.Act naturally
5.Found missing
6.Fully empty
7.Happily married

Submitted by: Alex
11

My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.

Submitted by: Siddharth Manchanda
4

Marriage is far more complicated than quantum physics.

Submitted by: William Mocca
90

The secret to a good marriage is… Divorce!!

Submitted by: Richo Chango
9

Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
The mafia wants either your money or life… Wives want both!

Submitted by: Amrik Singh
5

Before marriage, each looks at the other through rose- colored glasses. After marriage, they see each other with magnifying glasses!

Submitted by: Bob Bedford
7

Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!

Submitted by: Ralph ABK6
13

It seems like I was only married yesterday……..If it was tomorrow I would cancel it.

Submitted by: Darkside
12

Marriage is a union of give and take. He gives, She takes.

Submitted by: CRILLBO
11

Husband is the HEAD of the family and wife is the NECK that turns the head around!!
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Submitted by: payal
46

Marriage. Man’s worst nightmare.

Submitted by: Malik
11

When I married Ms Right, I didn’t know her first name was “Always” !

Submitted by: John
5

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
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Submitted by: Jake
11

Marriages are made in heaven. But, then again, so are thunder, lightening, tornadoes and hail.

Submitted by: supriya
42

Marriage is a place where two people have to live together for the rest of their lives…or at least until they get divorced!

Submitted by: Ridhima Shukla
13

Husbands? Just two words: “Yes, dear.”

Submitted by: Nicole

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