Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 4

19

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

6

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.

6

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

7

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
Woody Allen

7

Man: I wear the pants in the relationship.
Woman: I’m the belt that holds the pants up!

Submitted by: Hillary and Frank
18

Always remember: she’s right, you’re wrong, and you’re sorry.

Submitted by: Jamie K.
6

I haven’t spoken to my wife for many years. I love her so much that I don’t like to interrupt her.

Submitted by: Raj
6

My husband wears the pants in my house… The ones I pick.

Submitted by: Danielle
4

Marriage is like birds in a cage, those who are inside are struggling to get out and those who are outside are struggling to get in.

Submitted by: Samuel
7

Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.

Submitted by: Ed
7

Think your wife doesn’t listen to a word you say? Try talking in your sleep!

Submitted by: Frank Nigel
9

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Submitted by: kapil
17

My husband and I married for better or worse!! He couldn’t have done better and I couldn’t have done worse!

Submitted by: Rhonda
21

Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio.

24

Make love and not war
Or, find someone, marry them
And you can do both!

Submitted by: Paul Finkleman (the haikumedian)
7

A bachelor is a man who never makes the same mistake once.

156

You know… There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!!!
Bill Maher

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: You know… There is a name for...

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9

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr
25

The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.

Submitted by: ratnadeep
8

Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!

Submitted by: Ralph ABK6
1

Don’t marry a man to reform him – that’s what reform schools are for.
Mae West

8

Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.

Submitted by: yuri
18

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.

7

There are two sides in a marriage, one who is always right and the other is called…..the husband.

Submitted by: shirley
6

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

Submitted by: Randall

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