Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 4

12

My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.

Submitted by: Siddharth Manchanda
6

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together.

9

I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.

Submitted by: shalala
5

The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.

Submitted by: Leo
6

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

7

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
Woody Allen

7

Man: I wear the pants in the relationship.
Woman: I’m the belt that holds the pants up!

Submitted by: Hillary and Frank
19

Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio.

17

Always remember: she’s right, you’re wrong, and you’re sorry.

Submitted by: Jamie K.
16

My husband and I married for better or worse!! He couldn’t have done better and I couldn’t have done worse!

Submitted by: Rhonda
7

Think your wife doesn’t listen to a word you say? Try talking in your sleep!

Submitted by: Frank Nigel
9

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Submitted by: kapil
23

Make love and not war
Or, find someone, marry them
And you can do both!

Submitted by: Paul Finkleman (the haikumedian)
6

Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.

Submitted by: yuri
7

Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.

Submitted by: Ed
5

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

Submitted by: Randall
6

I haven’t spoken to my wife for many years. I love her so much that I don’t like to interrupt her.

Submitted by: Raj
7

A bachelor is a man who never makes the same mistake once.

36

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I am wrong and she agrees with me. :)

27

In our marriage everything is 50/50. I cook, he eats. I wash, we wears. I shop, he pays!

9

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr
25

The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.

Submitted by: ratnadeep
1

Don’t marry a man to reform him – that’s what reform schools are for.
Mae West

17

You have two options in a marriage. You can either be happy or you can be right.

Submitted by: Brandon B
8

Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!

Submitted by: Ralph ABK6

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