Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 4

20

African proverb: He who marries a beautiful wife and he who plants corn by the roadside all have the same problem; insecurity.

Submitted by: Nii ofori
12

My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.

Submitted by: Siddharth Manchanda
14

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

17

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I am wrong and she agrees with me. :)

4

The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.

Submitted by: Randall
6

Think your wife doesn’t listen to a word you say? Try talking in your sleep!

Submitted by: Frank Nigel
6

Married life is so easy. It’s just like a walk in the park.
BUT the problem is:
.
..

that the park is Jurassic!

Submitted by: AAMIR
9

I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.

Submitted by: shalala
14

Always remember: she’s right, you’re wrong, and you’re sorry.

Submitted by: Jamie K.
6

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

7

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
Woody Allen

16

Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio.

5

The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.

Submitted by: Leo
17

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

7

Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.

Submitted by: Ed
7

A bachelor is a man who never makes the same mistake once.

7

Man: I wear the pants in the relationship.
Woman: I’m the belt that holds the pants up!

Submitted by: Hillary and Frank
12

Once upon, there was this man who asked a woman “Will you marry me?”
The woman said “NO!”
Then the man lived happily ever after, rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and did whenever he wanted.
“THE END” (…true story)

Submitted by: DroidTsuenik9
17

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.

9

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr
9

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Submitted by: kapil
25

The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.

Submitted by: ratnadeep
8

Marriage is grand. Divorce, 200 grand.

Submitted by: Mariano Munoz
14

My husband and I married for better or worse!! He couldn’t have done better and I couldn’t have done worse!

Submitted by: Rhonda
6

Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.

Submitted by: yuri

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