Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 5

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I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.
– James Holt McGavran

My wife treats me like a God… She takes very little notice of my existence until she wants something.

Submitted by: Siddharth Manchanda

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
Groucho Marx

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: The husband who wants a happy marriage...

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Remember- you can either be happy or RIGHT.

Submitted by: casey

Height of misunderstanding – A man marrying his own secretary thinking that she will still follow his orders as before.

Submitted by: prashant

Never get married in college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.
Elbert Hubbard

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: Never get married in college; it’s hard...

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You have two options in a marriage. You can either be happy or you can be right.

Submitted by: Brandon B

I thought I was stupid until I got married, my stupidity was confirmed.

Submitted by: Toks

When ever you can afford to get married. Buy yourself a sports car.

Submitted by: Jet set
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