Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, ‘You’re only interested in one thing,’ and you can’t remember what it is.

A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he’s finished.
– Zsa Zsa Gabor

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
– Sacha Guitry

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

Married life is so easy. It’s just like a walk in the park.
BUT the problem is:
.
..

that the park is Jurassic!

Submitted by: AAMIR

I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.
– Patrick Murray

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years
– Sam Kinison

Marriage is one of the leading causes of divorce.

Submitted by: Dennis Mapfumo

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.
– Max Kauffmann

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn’t, they’d be married too.
– Henry Louis Mencken

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it’s not so hot.

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: A man’s wife has more power over...

It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.
Robert Frost

My husband wears the pants in my house… The ones I pick.

Submitted by: Danielle

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