Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 5
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.
Marriage is when a man and woman become one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
The only time my wife is listening to me is when I’m saying do you want some money.
The only moment that my wife listens to me is when I’m talking in my sleep.
Marriage turns night owls into homing pigeons.
Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get in it, it ain’t so hot.
Marriage is the most attractive jail “Cell” in which you choose to turn yourself in.
Marriage rocks! as in a rocky mountain…
Behind every successful wife, stands a surprised mother in law.
One day the thunderbolt will hit you, and if you survive that you’ll make the dumb mistake of getting married.
Marriages are made in heaven but they make hell on earth.
Marriage is when a man looses his bachelors degree and woman gets her masters degree.
African proverb: He who marries a beautiful wife and he who plants corn by the roadside all have the same problem; insecurity.
Remember- you can either be happy or RIGHT.
Love is one long sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock!
The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.
Marriage changes Everything!…..Suddenly your in Bed with A Relative!
A marriage license is a license which allows a woman to drive a man!
WHEN YOU SAY “I DO” , “YOUR DONE”!
A wife’s view point! “What’s “hers is hers”! And “What’s yours is hers also”!
Remember! If she ain’t happy, you ain’t happy either!
When I said, “I DO”! She said, “OH NO YOU DON’T”!
If my wife ran the world ,there wouldn’t be any wars… But there wouldn’t be any peace either!
I now truly believe “happily married” is an oxymoron.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
“Marriage is like a work; it’s routinary to serve your partner everyday.”
You know… There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!!!
- Bill Maher
My hubby may wear the pants in our family but I control the zipper!
These are great Ihope you don’t mind if I share them… I sent you a cup of coffee to enjoy… Thank you for the smiles and laughs…I needed them.
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
~ E. Joseph Cossman