Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 5
The only mistake for which people are congratulated is marriage.
Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it.
- Gene Perret
Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.
The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.
Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.
Your child is as you raise him. And your husband as you train him.
Once upon, there was this man who asked a woman “Will you marry me?”
The woman said “NO!”
Then the man lived happily ever after, rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and did whenever he wanted.
“THE END” (…true story)
Don’t marry a man to reform him – that’s what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
I never knew I had so many vices till I got married.
Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!
My wife and I always compromise. I admit I am wrong and she agrees with me. :)
Marriage is a union of give and take. He gives, She takes.
A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.
Husbands? Just two words: “Yes, dear.”
Marriage is like a poker game. You start out with a pair. She shows a heart. He flashes a diamond. She gets a flush. And he ends up with a full house and a big pot!!
The definition of True Love: Temporary insanity curable by marriage.
Marriage is just fancy word to adopt an over grown male child who is no more handled by his parents.
Married men live longer, but they are also more willing to die in more than one way!
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
- Bill Cosby
My wife swept me off my feet when we first met now all she does is tell me to lift my feet so she can sweep!
Marriage is a jail with out bail.
Marriage is grand. Divorce, 200 grand.
Marriage turns night owls into homing pigeons.
Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.
100% of divorces start in marriage.