Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 5
Marriage is a jail with out bail.
Today I celebrate 14 years of married life. I can’t remember breaking two mirrors.
A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.
An idea can change your life. A wife can change your idea.
Why all married men go to heaven?
Because they cannot be in hell twice.
I married Miss Right. Didn’t know her first name was Always.
Every time I find Mr. Right my husband scares him off.
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
– Groucho Marx
My wife swept me off my feet when we first met now all she does is tell me to lift my feet so she can sweep!
Marriage is just fancy word to adopt an over grown male child who is no more handled by his parents.
Marriage turns night owls into homing pigeons.
I never knew I had so many vices till I got married.
Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it.
Man + married + divorced + married again = stupid to the 3rd power
Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.
Marriages are made in heaven but they make hell on earth.
When ever you can afford to get married. Buy yourself a sports car.
Man is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.
Marriage is an institution in which those who are out want to get in and those who are in want to get out.
A married man is like a dead bird, his goose is cooked.
A husband’s last words should always be ‘OK buy it’.
They say marriage is life, they also say life ain’t fair.
Marriage means commitment, so does insanity…
9 out of 10 men are cheating on their wife, and there is one more who is still hesitating.
Marriage is, above all else, the leading cause of divorce.
Marriage is the most attractive jail “Cell” in which you choose to turn yourself in.
Marriage: I think my wife fell in love with annoying me.
I found another word for slave… Groom
When a man goes down on his knees to ask a women to marry him, and she says yes, he remains on his knees forever.
Are you a man or a mouse? I’m a man if I was a mouse the wife would be frightened of me.