Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 5
I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Marriage is far more complicated than quantum physics.
A man marries a woman hoping she would never change, a woman marries a man thinking that she can change him.
My husband wears the pants in my house… The ones I pick.
Married life is so easy. It’s just like a walk in the park.
BUT the problem is:
that the park is Jurassic!
Marriage is a union of give and take. He gives, She takes.
I never knew I had so many vices till I got married.
Marriage is a mutual misunderstanding.
I thought I was stupid until I got married, my stupidity was confirmed.
Make love and not war
Or, find someone, marry them
And you can do both!
Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it.
- Gene Perret
My wife swept me off my feet when we first met now all she does is tell me to lift my feet so she can sweep!
Love is like a dream, but marriage is like an alarm clock!!!!!
Once upon, there was this man who asked a woman “Will you marry me?”
The woman said “NO!”
Then the man lived happily ever after, rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and did whenever he wanted.
“THE END” (…true story)
Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?
Husbands? Just two words: “Yes, dear.”
There are two sides in a marriage, one who is always right and the other is called…..the husband.
When a man goes down on his knees to ask a women to marry him, and she says yes, he remains on his knees forever.
Don’t marry a man to reform him – that’s what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it.