Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 6
Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
– Chris Rock
Before marriage, each looks at the other through rose- colored glasses. After marriage, they see each other with magnifying glasses!
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
– Groucho Marx
Marriage is the longest COLD WAR ever fought.
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, ‘You’re only interested in one thing,’ and you can’t remember what it is.
I don’t like the terms “housewife” and “homemaker” I’m prepared to be called “Domestic Goddess”.. It’s more descriptive.
Marriage is like a poker game. You start out with a pair. She shows a heart. He flashes a diamond. She gets a flush. And he ends up with a full house and a big pot!!
Once upon, there was this man who asked a woman “Will you marry me?”
The woman said “NO!”
Then the man lived happily ever after, rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and did whenever he wanted.
“THE END” (…true story)
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
~ E. Joseph Cossman