Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings - Page 6
Always remember: she’s right, you’re wrong, and you’re sorry.
The four most important words in marriage are: “I’ll do the dishes”.
Pierre & Marysa
A married man is like a dead bird, his goose is cooked.
I haven’t spoken to my wife for many years. I love her so much that I don’t like to interrupt her.
Marriage is worse than prison. There is no parole for good behavior.
Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio.
Your child is as you raise him. And your husband as you train him.
Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.
Marriage turns night owls into homing pigeons.
Man: I wear the pants in the relationship.
Woman: I’m the belt that holds the pants up!
A happy marriage is a balancing act between “Rocking” & “On the rocks”.
Mom: When I married you’re father I had to put all my dreams on wait.
Daughter: Really what was you’re dream.
Mom: To be single and childless.
Chinese proverb: Marriage is like a besieged fortress: those on the outside want in, and those on the inside want out.
9 out of 10 men are cheating on their wife, and there is one more who is still hesitating.
The definition of True Love: Temporary insanity curable by marriage.
I married Miss Right. Didn’t know her first name was Always.
Why all married men go to heaven?
Because they cannot be in hell twice.
Marriages are made in heaven but they make hell on earth.
The decision to stay unmarried is the beginning of wisdom.
A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.