Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years
– Sam Kinison

Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up
– Evelyn Hendrickson

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.
– Max Kauffmann

Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it’s not so hot.

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Funny Marriage Quotes Quote: A man’s wife has more power over...

Here’s a toast to our wives and girlfriends … May they never meet!! ? ?

Submitted by: jamal nasr

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
Rodney Dangerfield

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Marriage is a union of give and take. He gives, She takes.

Submitted by: CRILLBO

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half- shut afterwards.
– Benjamin Franklin

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
– Henry Youngman

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
– Henny Youngman

My wife suggested a book for me to read to enhance our relationship. It’s titled, “Women are from Venus, Men are Wrong.”

Marriage – a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters written in prose.
– Beverly Nichols

Why all married men go to heaven?
Because they cannot be in hell twice.

Submitted by: munaf

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