The definition of True Love: Temporary insanity curable by marriage.
“I won’t have another drink my wife said if I am not home by 9 -45, my life is not worth living”. His friend said “what are you a man or a mouse”. He said “I am a man if I was a mouse the wife would be frightened of me”.
Marriage means commitment, so does insanity…
A friend of mine once asked his wife, where she wanted to go for their anniversary. His wife said “Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!”..So… He took her to the kitchen.
The four most important words in marriage are: “I’ll do the dishes”. Pierre & Marysa
A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. – Phyllis Diller
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend. – Rodney Dangerfield
They say marriage is life, they also say life ain’t fair.
When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the one that’s mad. – Helen Rowland
Women marry for prosperity, development and security whereas men marry for enjoyment, destruction and insecurity.
Why dogs don’t get married? Because they are already leading a dog’s life.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake thinking about something you said; after marriage , he’ll fall asleep before you finish saying it. – Helen Rowland
Marriage is a sentence… A life sentence.
When a man goes down on his knees to ask a women to marry him, and she says yes, he remains on his knees forever.
A woman before marriage is your very best friend, after marriage she’s just a plain old’ dog.
If marriages are made in heaven… Then it’s obvious that someone up there doesn’t like us.
Kapil : How is your wife? Shahrukh : An angel from heaven. And yours? Kapil : Still Alive.
When a girl marries, she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one. – Helen Rowland
I now truly believe “happily married” is an oxymoron.
Marriage rocks! as in a rocky mountain…
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