Funny Marriage Quotes and Sayings
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
– Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage is like birds in a cage, those who are inside are struggling to get out and those who are outside are struggling to get in.
The most important thing in a relationship between a man and a woman is that one of them must be good at taking orders.
Marriage turns night owls into homing pigeons.
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.
– Ogden Nash
Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it.
– Gene Perret
My wife swept me off my feet when we first met now all she does is tell me to lift my feet so she can sweep!
Every time I find Mr. Right my husband scares him off.
Man + married + divorced + married again = stupid to the 3rd power
An idea can change your life. A wife can change your idea.
100% of divorces start in marriage.
Marriages are made in heaven but they make hell on earth.
Your child is as you raise him. And your husband as you train him.
Marriage is a jail with out bail.
Marriage is a sacred institution, everyone who does it ends up with their own private room eventually.