Funny Men Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
God made men because every good thing needs a blue print.
Men are like bank accounts, without money they don’t generate a lot of interest.
A husband is someone who after taking the trash out gives the impression he’s cleaned the whole house!
Men…. I don’t get them, they spend 9 months of their life waiting to come out and the rest of their life trying to get in.
Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, every saturday he and his friends will load up beer and go fishing.
If women belong in the kitchen, shouldn’t men belong in the garage with all the other tools?! (- :
They say, “Early to bed, early to rise makes a Man healty, wealthy and wise”, Well I’m not too sure if its entirely true, because I have never seen a healthy, wealthy and wise man.
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract!
I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.
– Zsa Zsa Gabor
The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
– Lana Turner
There are two kind of men who don’t understand women: singles and husbands.
Wise woman always support there husbands career, they know there investing in a higher- future- alimony.
Having more than one wife is bigamy, having more than one husband is insanity!
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
– Tim Allen
Q: Why is it so hard to find a man that’s caring, considerate, and nice?
A: Because he already has a boyfriend.
Things you’ll never hear a man say…
If you never want to see a man again, say, ‘I love you, I want to marry you. I want to have children…’ – they leave skid marks.
You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
– Erica Jong
Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it’s quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.
– Rita Rudner
If at first you don’t succeed then you are probably a man.
A genius is a man who can rewrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over.
– Dino Levi