Funny Men Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
When a woman wants a man’s opinion…She gives it to him.
If they can send man to the moon why can’t they send them all?
A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
– Gloria Steinem
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.
– Rita Rudner
Men are like blenders. You know you need one, but you’re not sure why.
Q: Why is it so hard to find a man that’s caring, considerate, and nice?
A: Because he already has a boyfriend.
Men are like commercials, you can’t believe a word they say.
Men are like buses… if you miss one another one will be coming in 5 minutes.
What do men and clouds have in common???….. When both are not around it’s a nice day!
Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
– Rene Descartes
Men are like bank accounts, without money they don’t generate a lot of interest.
Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it’s quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.
– Rita Rudner
Men who don’t understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands.
We can train a monkey to fly a jet but we can’t train a man to be humble.
If at first you don’t succeed then you are probably a man.
What are three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? “Hold my purse”
Men…. I don’t get them, they spend 9 months of their life waiting to come out and the rest of their life trying to get in.
Most men think monogamy is what dining room tables are made of.
A man – if he has all the good qualities of a MAN can be considered as one of THE WONDERS OF THE WORLD…
One thing all men need to know: Its cheaper to keep her.
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
– Groucho Marx
You know… There is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… Husband!!!
– Bill Maher
Men would rather buy you a drink than give you the hard cash to go help yourself.
Boys are like dogs they run away then come back to you the very next day.
Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, every saturday he and his friends will load up beer and go fishing.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.