Funny Men Quotes and Sayings - Page 4
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
– Groucho Marx
Men are from Mars, women are from Venus; ex’s are from Uranus.
Why don’t men get Mad Cow Disease?
Because they’re all pigs.
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.
– Rita Rudner
Men don’t take direction very well. But eventually when they realize the direction was correct they take all the credit.
God made men because every good thing needs a blue print.
A man can never be careful until he buys a new car and a white shirt.
All men are dogs, the difference is the barking rate!
There are two kind of men who don’t understand women: singles and husbands.
Wise woman always support there husbands career, they know there investing in a higher- future- alimony.
Having more than one wife is bigamy, having more than one husband is insanity!
Behind every successful man there’s a woman, behind every unsuccessful man there are several women.
They say, “Early to bed, early to rise makes a Man healty, wealthy and wise”, Well I’m not too sure if its entirely true, because I have never seen a healthy, wealthy and wise man.
If human beings originated from monkeys, why do men act like dogs???
Dogs should not be compared to men, they are much better.
Men are like Bluetooth connection, when you are beside them, they stay connected but when you are away, they search for new devices.
Men are like toilets; deep, dark and full of sh**!
A women needs a man like fish need a bicycle.
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract!
Things you’ll never hear a man say…
A man is always ready to go, it’s a women that says whether yes or no!
I like my men like I like my coffee. Tied up in a burlap bag and dragged through mountains.
All men are dogs. It’s just that some make better pets!
I’m a guy. Since when do we get anything right the first time?
– Will Smith
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
– Groucho Marx
Don’t expect a woman that has no money to think negative And never expect a man loaded with cash to think positive.
He suffers from delusions of grandeur; nevertheless he is truly grand!