Funny Women Quotes and Sayings

14

Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
George Carlin

Funny Women Quotes Quote: Here’s all you have to know about...

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27

If the world were ruled by women then there would be no war… Just couple of nations not talking with each other.

Submitted by: Melody
36

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

Submitted by: Nabil
7

Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Submitted by: zora
13

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
George Carlin

18

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Submitted by: wholio
71

Women: Scientifically proven to be right even when they’re wrong.

Submitted by: Spazz_princess15
25

God made Adam first because he didn’t want any advise from Eve how to make Adam.

Submitted by: Dupie
27

Women sleep on the right side of the bed because even in their sleep they have to be right!

Submitted by: robin mukherjee
0

When a woman says “do whatever you want” do NOT do whatever you want.

22

One day, a long long time ago, there was a woman who didn’t complain, criticize, or nag…but like I said, it was a long long time ago and just for a day!

Submitted by: Dubbs
6

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way.

Submitted by: shady
1

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
Oscar Wilde

8

Fake hair, fake nails, fake eye lash, artificial face and sometimes fake behavior, yet a woman will say she needs a real man.

Submitted by: idi
16

Men will spend 2 dollars on a 1 dollar item that they desperately need. Women will spend 1 dollar on a 2 dollar item that they don’t need at all.

Submitted by: Jacob
3

What a strange thing man is; and what a stranger thing woman.
– Lord Byron

24

Women Are Like Hurricanes… When They Come, They’re Loud… When They’re Gone, So Is The House, The Dog And The Car.

Submitted by: Unknown
10

Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice.
Bill Cosby

4

I wonder why it is, that young men are always cautioned against bad girls. Anyone can handle a bad girl. It’s the good girls men should be warned against.

28

Because I’m a guy, I think what you’re wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now?

Submitted by: blonco
5

To generalize on women is dangerous. To specialize on them is infinitely worse.
– Rudolph Valentino

4

The great and almost only comfort about being a woman is that one can always pretend to be more stupid than one is and no one is surprised.
– Freya Stark

4

Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty- eight and forty.
– James Thurber

12

Only a woman can make a man feel wrong, when he does good.

Submitted by: James
1

Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three- dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
– Phyllis Diller


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