Funny Women Quotes and Sayings - Page 2
What do women and tornadoes have in common? They both moan when they come and they take the house when they leave.
Women speak two languages. One of which is verbal.
I don’t condone wife beating, but I understand it!
I don’t need an encyclopedia, my wife knows everything.
99% of all women are beautiful. The remaining 1% is in my office.
Q: How to turn a fox into and elephant?
A: Marry her.
Q: What’s the difference between the abominable snowman & an intelligent woman?
A: There have been a few reported sightings of the snowman.
Why do only 60% of women go to heaven…because if they all went it would be hell.
Men socialize by insulting one another, but they don’t really mean it. Women socialize by complimenting one another… But they don’t really mean it, either.
Women are cute…until you marry them!!
Girls are like smart phones when we finally figure them out they upgrade to a smarter version.
Don’t judge a women from 100 feet away.
Fake hair, fake nails, fake eye lash, artificial face and sometimes fake behavior, yet a woman will say she needs a real man.
Women are like cars, the better it looks the higher it costs.
So I was up all night trying to make a website for women drivers, but it kept on crashing.
Women are like cars, we enjoy them when they are new because they don’t give problems, when they get old they give problems and we want to sell them.
There was a time when girls use to be intelligent, it was before the formation of universe.
Unlike women, the older the wine the sweeter it becomes.
How to find a wife…
Step 1 of 2: Find a woman you like now but you know you’re going to hate in 5 or less years.
Step 2 of 2: Give her your house.
Two most deadly weapons in the world: Women’s nagging and Women’s tears! Can make any man act like a tortoise, right into the shell. Don’t believe me, try it…he he he:P
Women are a language men will never understand.
A woman look ten times more beautiful when she is sleeping, but only to her husband.:P
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Ladies, why you ask if a dress makes you look fat? Why you no see your fat makes you look fat?
Why did god create men first?
He didn’t want to be coached on how to make him.
A man may be right or wrong…but a woman is always right