Funny Women Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
Women… Can’t live with ‘em… Can’t shoot ‘em.
A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.
Women are an alien race set down among us.
Women are like elephants. Everyone likes to look at them but no- one likes to have to keep one.
- W. C. Fields
What do women and tornadoes have in common? They both moan when they come and they take the house when they leave.
The best way to make a woman listen to you, direct your talk to another woman.
Women are like cars, the better it looks the higher it costs.
The male body has seven trillion nerves and only a woman knows “How to get on every single one of them?”
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.
When women go wrong, men go right after them.
- Mae West
Men socialize by insulting one another, but they don’t really mean it. Women socialize by complimenting one another… But they don’t really mean it, either.
For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
- Virginia Woolf
Women fake orgasms and men fake finances.
- Suze Orman
Women are like banks, they take every cent you got and give you very little Interest..
You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and out the other.
Tell a woman something, it goes in both ears and comes out through the mouth..
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age. If she tells that, she’ll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
A woman who doesn’t change her mind doesn’t have one.
Women speak two languages. One of which is verbal.
A man may be right or wrong…but a woman is always right
There are two excellent theories for arguing with women… Neither one works.
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
Women are like bank accounts. No money, no interest.
Women are a language men will never understand.
The best way to always get the last word in any argument with your wife or girlfriend?
Women are a strange breed.
They paint their lips;
Show off their inner-wear;
Flaunt their bodies;
Wear butt-hugging jeans;
And then they expect men to notice their emotions!