Funny Women Quotes and Sayings - Page 3
Women… Can’t live with ‘em… Can’t shoot ‘em.
Women are like cars, the better it looks the higher it costs.
Women are an alien race set down among us.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.
Women are like elephants. Everyone likes to look at them but no- one likes to have to keep one.
- W. C. Fields
What do women and tornadoes have in common? They both moan when they come and they take the house when they leave.
The best way to make a woman listen to you, direct your talk to another woman.
When women go wrong, men go right after them.
- Mae West
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age. If she tells that, she’ll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
Women are like police, they can have all the evidence in the world but they still want a confession.
Men are from Mars, women are from Venus; ex’s are from Uranus.
The male body has seven trillion nerves and only a woman knows “How to get on every single one of them?”
Women are like banks, they take every cent you got and give you very little Interest..
Women fake orgasms and men fake finances.
- Suze Orman
Men socialize by insulting one another, but they don’t really mean it. Women socialize by complimenting one another… But they don’t really mean it, either.
For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
- Virginia Woolf
A man may be right or wrong…but a woman is always right
Someday they’re going to call me “M’am” without adding “You’re making a scene”.
A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.
There are two excellent theories for arguing with women… Neither one works.
A woman who doesn’t change her mind doesn’t have one.
Women speak two languages. One of which is verbal.
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
The best way to always get the last word in any argument with your wife or girlfriend?
Men are from mars, women are from “Do I look fat in these?”.