Funny Women Quotes and Sayings - Page 5

139

If a woman tells you that she is single by choice, its probably because no one has chosen her.

Submitted by: stoopid
121

The two faces of a coin decides a woman’s mind. Head, they go for money. Tail, they go for money…

Submitted by: Leleesh
166

Women are like an email in your inbox, you cannot wait to open it, and when you open it, then you realize its a virus.

Submitted by: Nabil
227

Whats the difference between a battery and a woman?
Batteries have a positive side.
Why shouldn’t woman have a drivers license?
Because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom.

Submitted by: arrieffy
68

Happiness is not the only thing in the world. Which is exactly why every girl should fall in love with a man.

Submitted by: oviya
90

Women are like telephones they like to be held and talked to but if you push the wrong buttons you could be disconnected :]

Submitted by: whats it to ya
186

Men are from earth, Women are from earth, deal with it!!

Submitted by: Lou
189

If Women were Cars, then the men would save more fuel…nobody wants a car that decides where to go, when to go and for how long.

Submitted by: H.H
133

Avoid girls save fuel

Submitted by: Rohit
18

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Submitted by: wholio
71

Women: Scientifically proven to be right even when they’re wrong.

Submitted by: Spazz_princess15
14

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
George Carlin

4

The great and almost only comfort about being a woman is that one can always pretend to be more stupid than one is and no one is surprised.
– Freya Stark

8

When a woman behaves like a man, why doesn’t she behave like a nice man?
– Dame Edith Evans

5

I wonder why it is, that young men are always cautioned against bad girls. Anyone can handle a bad girl. It’s the good girls men should be warned against.

4

Despite my thirty years of research into the woman soul, I have not yet been able to answer the great question that has never been answered: What does a woman want?
– Sigmund Freud

1

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
Oscar Wilde

6

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: ‘This looks much better on.’ On what? On fire?
Rita Rudner

5

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
– Joan Rivers

11

Women should have labels on their foreheads saying, ‘Government Health Warning: women can seriously damage your brains, current account, confidence, and good standing among your friends’.

6

Women are an alien race set down among us.

11

Women… Can’t live with ‘em… Can’t shoot ‘em.

7

When women go wrong, men go right after them.
Mae West

11

If a woman insists on being called Ms, ask her if it stands for miserable.

6

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx


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