Funny Women Quotes and Sayings - Page 6
Women should have labels on their foreheads saying, ‘Government Health Warning: women can seriously damage your brains, current account, confidence, and good standing among your friends’.
Women are an alien race set down among us.
Women… Can’t live with ‘em… Can’t shoot ‘em.
Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice.
- Bill Cosby
Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty- eight and forty.
- James Thurber
Women: Can’t live with them, can’t bury them in the back yard without the neighbors seeing.
- Sean Williamson
There are three ways to spread news: telegram, television, and tellawoman.
Women are like elephants. Everyone likes to look at them but no- one likes to have to keep one.
- W. C. Fields
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age. If she tells that, she’ll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.
- Edgar Watson Howe
From 30 feet away she looked like a lot of class. From 15 feet away she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.
- Raymond Chandler
To generalize on women is dangerous. To specialize on them is infinitely worse.
- Rudolph Valentino
A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s – That’s because she changes it more often.
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.
- Tim Allen
What a strange thing man is; and what a stranger thing woman.
- Lord Byron
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.
A woman voting for divorce is like a turkey voting for Christmas.
No one can argue any longer about the rights of women. It’s like arguing about earthquakes.
- Lillian Hellman
For all men who say ‘A woman’s place is in the kitchen’ remember that’s where the knives are kept.
For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
- Virginia Woolf
Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three- dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
- Phyllis Diller