Funny Women Quotes and Sayings

You know a women is about to say something smart when she starts her sentence with “A man once told me”…

Submitted by: frank

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
Chris Rock

Women are like an email in your inbox, you cannot wait to open it, and when you open it, then you realize its a virus.

Submitted by: Nabil

I think the inventor of the mirror is a man who was tired of always being asked how do I look by his wife.

Submitted by: Maduwa Thabo

Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
Phyllis Diller

So I was up all night trying to make a website for women drivers, but it kept on crashing.

Submitted by: tom

Two most deadly weapons in the world: Women’s nagging and Women’s tears! Can make any man act like a tortoise, right into the shell. Don’t believe me, try it…he he he:P

Submitted by: Ashish Mittal
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Unlike women, the older the wine the sweeter it becomes.

Submitted by: Japhethmaiyo

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
Virginia Woolf

I don’t condone wife beating, but I understand it!

Submitted by: Marty

If a woman tells you that she is single by choice, its probably because no one has chosen her.

Submitted by: stoopid

A wise man once said “I don’t know, ask a girl.”

Submitted by: tiara123
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It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.
Rodney Dangerfield

There is no doubt that all women are crazy. It’s just a matter of degree.

Submitted by: Kris

If Women were Cars, then the men would save more fuel…nobody wants a car that decides where to go, when to go and for how long.

Submitted by: H.H

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