Funny Women Quotes and Sayings

You know a women is about to say something smart when she starts her sentence with “A man once told me”…

Submitted by: frank

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
Chris Rock

Women are like an email in your inbox, you cannot wait to open it, and when you open it, then you realize its a virus.

Submitted by: Nabil

I think the inventor of the mirror is a man who was tired of always being asked how do I look by his wife.

Submitted by: Maduwa Thabo

Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
Phyllis Diller

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So I was up all night trying to make a website for women drivers, but it kept on crashing.

Submitted by: tom

Two most deadly weapons in the world: Women’s nagging and Women’s tears! Can make any man act like a tortoise, right into the shell. Don’t believe me, try it…he he he:P

Submitted by: Ashish Mittal

Unlike women, the older the wine the sweeter it becomes.

Submitted by: Japhethmaiyo

It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.
Rodney Dangerfield

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
Virginia Woolf

I don’t condone wife beating, but I understand it!

Submitted by: Marty
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If a woman tells you that she is single by choice, its probably because no one has chosen her.

Submitted by: stoopid

A wise man once said “I don’t know, ask a girl.”

Submitted by: tiara123

There is no doubt that all women are crazy. It’s just a matter of degree.

Submitted by: Kris

Halloween is for dressing as something you’re not. That’s why most girls go as sexy.

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