Humour Quotes and Sayings

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Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don’t laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.
- Criss Jami

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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
- Colette

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Laughing will give your diaphragm a work out, will show you have a sense of humour and can increase your life by 8 years – so laugh!

Submitted by: Ally
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You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
- Bill Cosby

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Men are always ready to respect anything that bores them.
- Marilyn Monroe

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If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.
- Johnny Depp

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If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
- George Carlin

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A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles.
- Mignon McLaughlin

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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
- Woody Allen

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Simplest way to have a happy life? Put humor in everything that you do.

Submitted by: Den'Z Casa
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It is impossible to love and be wise.
- Francis Bacon

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Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
- Dave Barry

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One loses everything when one loses one’s sense of humor.
- Ayn Rand

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A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
- Oscar Wilde

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I personally believe we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain.
- Jane Wagner

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It seems to me that a man who is incapable of humor is capable of cruelty.
- Bette Greene

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I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine.
- Peter Ustinov

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I felt like an animal, and animals don’t know sin, do they?
- Jess C. Scott

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I don’t hate people. I just feel better when they aren’t around.
- Charles Bukowski

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Short cuts make long delays.
- J.R.R. Tolkien


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