Fear of the World

DownUp +22

A dark sea churns in my chest,
I feel like I’m losing breath,
Fear clogs up my throat,
In anxiety’s chokehold

Deep breath in and out comes choppy both ways
I want to scream! Should I pray?
Practically shaking
Out the window goes rational thinking,
Wondering, wondering
Worst scenarios playing

What if? What if? The room is too small
Or I’m too big I don’t know I don’t know
Help me! Help me! Please don’t touch me

I’m surrounded yet isolated
I think my friends are secretly bored of me,
My mother never wanted me,
Father left me,
Brother hates me

All that’s left is me
I’m scared, I’m scared
Of myself and of the world
Who am i? Who am i?
Everyone else seems to know except i

Why? I ask, why?
Failure encloses me in folds of cold darkness
My heart begins to beat more not less

It’s as though I captured
A bird and locked it away in my
Chest. Beating, banging, struggling to escape
Locked in my mind I slowly suffocate.

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