Funny Poems, Poetry
I wondered happy as a clown.
Walking with a smile not a frown.
I passed a man he was on the street.
He asked for something good to eat.
I had food so I couldn’t tell him no.
I just didn’t mention it was from a week ago.
In the park where children play.
I thought I might head that way.
Found a tree with just my luck.
Went behind it and peed in a cup.
Saw a kid looking hot in the shade.
Said here kid try some lemonade.
It was hot so something to drink would be nice.
So I headed out to get a water ice.
The line was huge from China you could see.
So I said step aside everything is on me.
I got rainbow flavor and said by to Will.
And on the counter I left monopoly bills.
I went back home and kicked off my shoes.
I turned on the TV and I was on the news.
The man on the street said I was totally out of order.
The kid from the park said I need to drink water.
The man who sold water ice said I was the worst.
I just said don’t these guys know it’s April First.
This post was submitted by Sharod Blake.
I was sitting in a coffee shop
Just thinking about life
When along came a woman
I wish were my wife
She was tall blonde and beautiful
The likes I’ve never seen
And I noticed right away
Her eyes were glowing green
Her breast’s were protruding
So large, but yet so firm
I was trying to stay in control
But I was squirming like a worm
When she came and sat beside me
I didn’t know what to say
So I said in an instant
Can we do it my way
She smiled ever so brightly
Then turned to me and said
I wouldn’t be with you
If every man on earth were dead.
This post was submitted by Jitter.
LOTS OF QUESTION TO BE SOLVED
BUT NO ANSWERS IN MY MIND
LOTS OF THOUGHTS ARE GATHERING INSIDE
BUT DON’T KNOW WHAT AND HOW TO WRITE
I HAVE TO DO IT ANY HOW
BUT ANSWERS ARE NOT READY NOW
I HAVE TO FINISH ALL WITHIN THE TIME
WANT TO CHEAT BUT KNOW ITS A CRIME
OUT OF FIFTY I KNOW ONLY TEN
MY INK IS RUNNING OUT OF MY PEN
HOW TO PASS THIS ONE HOUR
FORCE TO STAY HERE PLEASE GIVE ME POWER
I KNOW I WILL PASS MY EXAM NEVER
THIS IS BECAUSE I AM SUFFERING FROM EXAMINATION FEVER.
This post was submitted by Sajju Manandhar.
Oh mosquito come have your delight,
Take away the peace of this silent night,
For in this silence with his memories I reunite,
A union that shall never again see daylight.
Come fill my ears with your loud buzz,
So I may forget his musical voice,
And expunge those unfulfilled promises,
Forever from my conscious.
Tire me out completely,
Till my eyelids close effortlessly,
So much that I sleep without a dream,
And wake up without any knowledge of him.
This post was submitted by Nusratt.
I’ve just looked at myself in the mirror,
My God! what a terrible sight,
Eyes are all bleary and bloodshot
As if I’ve been boozing all night.
My nose is too large and it’s ugly,
It’s oozing all over my face,
And the place that I think that my mouth is
Is nowt but a blooming great space.
My five o’clock shadow looks dirty,
My forehead is wizened and lined.
People with faces like mine is
Ought to be heavily fined.
The effect that it must have on children
Is shattering, and on the old.
I should have been exterminated
At birth, or so I’ve been told.
My hair is all wild and unruly,
There are bags hanging under my eyes,
My cheeks are all hollow and sunken,
For my looks they don’t give a prize.
Still, I’ve got quite a wonderful nature,
I’m generous, good-hearted, and kind,
Perhaps I’ll get lucky and marry
A good looking girl who is blind.
This post was submitted by Ken Carter.
I saw a ghost
A gorgeous ghost
Whose smile I cant forget
Whose face I long to touch.
And whose voice I love to hear
The only ghost
I wont afraid to see
The only ghost I wish will hunt me.
This post was submitted by Jenniza I Estillore.
The clock is not ticking it stopped hours ago.
The batteries flat? How should I know?
It worked in the sunshine, but not in the shower.
How should I know what it uses for power?
My pen is not working it’s run out of ink.
How should I know the color was pink?
It worked in the sunshine but not in the rain.
How should I know it ran down the drain?
My brain is not working it stopped years ago.
How did it happen? How should I know?
This post was submitted by Diana Fredriksson.