Alcohol – Because no great story every started with someone eating a salad.

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  • Let’s face it – no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.
  • Alcohol, because nothing good started with someone having a salad.
  • “Live each day like it were your last.” sounded like great advice. Until I started...
  • You never know what you’re missing until you start drinking alcohol.
  • Its good to leave alcohol, its not good to not know where you left it!...
  • When it comes to eating right and exercising, there is no “I’ll start tomorrow.” Tomorrow...
  • The patient dog eats the fattest bone…who eats the meat? The fastest dog of course!
  • Reality is merely an illusion caused by a lack of alcohol Im not as think...
  • Going to McDonald’s for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
  • My doctor put an insect in a glass of alcohol, it died – He asked...
  • Listen, I’m not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I’m a drunk, we go to...
  • Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out...
  • Obesity is a disease. It makes everything taste good except salad.
  • I’m not a alcoholic I’m a drunk alcoholics go 2 meetings
  • Great love affairs start with Champagne and end with tisane. – Honore de Balzac

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