Sarcastic Quotes and Sayings - Page 2

If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
Don’t be humble. You’re not that great.
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
If you’re too open-minded, your brains will [...]

144 Comments to “Sarcastic Quotes and Sayings”

• 21. therandomone wrote on 28 November, 2008, 3:31

   Vote: 171   85  

  On the other hand, you have different fingers.
• 22. Jen wrote on 8 December, 2008, 0:03

   Vote: 250   87  

  You: Go to Hell!
  Me: See you there.
• 23. hachi"s girl wrote on 14 December, 2008, 4:50

   Vote: 310   56  

  Well my imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems
• 24. cijan rike wrote on 14 December, 2008, 20:54

   Vote: 212   89  

  Person 1: ” You did not just do that!!”
  Person 2: “no? watch I’ll do it again!!”
• 25. Raden wrote on 31 December, 2008, 3:38

   Vote: 150   79  

  You’re unique just like everyone else!
• 26. Tisma wrote on 2 January, 2009, 1:22

   Vote: 144   276  

  Me: what’s half of eight

  you: Zero
• 27. Da Cool Dude wrote on 11 January, 2009, 16:23

   Vote: 58   447  

  Lady-Do you steal?
  Boy-Lady if I was a thief why would I tell you?
• 28. Coral :heart: Toast wrote on 12 January, 2009, 15:30

   Vote: 30   530  

  Ok OK this is cheesy but funny:

  Mom/Dad: You may have Memory loss
  You: What’s memory loss
  Where Are we?
  Who are you?
  Who am I?
• 29. PlayMisty4Me wrote on 13 January, 2009, 18:12

   Vote: 233   41  

  Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.
• 30. Carina Aly Ceara wrote on 14 January, 2009, 4:17

   Vote: 280   35  

  I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.

  “Don’t make me hit you again!”
  “You’re going to hit me again? No, don’t do that! I might not survive!”

  Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?

  I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.

  “I’d insult you, but the sad truth is that you wouldn’t understand and if I tried to explain it to you, your brain might implode from information overload.”
• 31. Franzeska wrote on 15 January, 2009, 17:43

   Vote: 318   23  

  i am busy right now, can i ignore you some other time?
• 32. tiaa. wrote on 23 January, 2009, 3:11

   Vote: 370   19  

  silence is golden.
  duct tape is silver.
• 33. Jamie wrote on 24 January, 2009, 18:08

   Vote: 85   135  

  “There’s a special place in Hell for people like you.”
• 34. Stefana wrote on 26 January, 2009, 4:16

   Vote: 148   55  

  Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…
• 35. Stefana wrote on 26 January, 2009, 4:18

   Vote: 91   144  

  aww thank you…
  I’m flattered that you’re jelous of me!
• 36. Darryl Parryl wrote on 28 January, 2009, 21:36

   Vote: 126   74  

  A boy is hammering nails onto the table:

  Mom: What are you doing?!

  The boy: Is that a trick question?
• 37. Dessy wrote on 31 January, 2009, 7:28

   Vote: 298   55  

  You: I’m going to be a comedian one day!

  Me: *Bursts into fits of giggles*

  You: Whats so funny?

  Me: *gasps* oh! you were being serious, i’m sorry.
• 38. Rhyza wrote on 31 January, 2009, 13:46

   Vote: 197   49  

  If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, its because you’re both heading in the same direction.
• 39. Nana wrote on 31 January, 2009, 13:59

   Vote: 97   65  

  You always do me a favor, when you shut up!
• 40. Lily :) wrote on 1 February, 2009, 3:23

   Vote: 71   107  

  Sarcasm is anger’s evil cousin.

  -Anger Management